A Simple Me, Daring For Ultimatums

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Day 13 - This is a letter for you & I wonder where your heart has gone to


It's been a month and 13 days. I could not take it?

My Ego: Yes I could take it.
My Bright Brain: I cannot take it anymore.
My Emotion Brain: I'm fine, instead I feel fine.
My Intelligence Brain: Let's not twist the grey hair.

I really wonder where your heart has gone to. I'm frustrated, bet I am, a bit. Because I spoke up literally with actions and words. Am I pulling my guts? No, I am not. I am sure. I have guts like you dared me to. And, where are you?...Who's coward now?

Yes, I do always feel you because I am Mark. Mark who has NO Black Power to plot magic over anyone in HIS FUCKING LIFE just to achieve and to attain is really Mark who speaks and dares to pick pebbles on the streets and drains to do the flip-flop throws in the river. Mark is just Mark. Mark who believes in God, totally, is not a bloody bastard to say "Yes" and "I have decided" funnily. I am not a bastard when it comes to my senses of seriousness to someone whom I take as a soul for my soul.

Yeah, thank you for the text that really hurts me so well, and yeah it is swollen and has yellow ooze since. Thank you for leaving the mark (Cuts and Pains in my freaking heart) to Mark. Thank you, yeah, for the ass-pain in my heart. Thank you, yeah, yeah, yeah...My heart is still in pain, if you care.

Would I be devastated? Who cares if I am or if I would be, right? Who cares Mark, eh? Because Mark has been a worldly renown PERSON in this fucking earth that people say A WARRIOR...yeah me the Berlin Wall (since you've never known or recognised me)...I am fanatic, NO...Of course not, because I have an educated well training decisive thinking brain which makes me Mark. You have never met somebody like me before, I don't know!, I am not God or even Jesus Christ, yada yada yada...And if you do never meet someone like me, well I am not some bloody pig who does the moshing dance that makes me sweat because I am the Man of Words.

Being the Man of Words, I really do the acts. You try to turn the turtle head to its tail to me or on me, I have recognised it long time ago, but I have surrendered that time because I have already put my love to you. I am in love with you. I love you. Loving someone is making you stupid and playing stupid, why must you ignore it? Why must you say it is a game? Why must you decline love which God really asks us to practice it among each other?...You have some doubts on the last question, I must ask you to RE-STUDY the New Testament scripts. 

But, I will NOT stop loving you.

And, I am NOT that FREAK who will STALK & DASH & KIDNAP & SLIT you.

I am centered.

Mark - pathetic? Go on, say it, twice, thrice, many many times as you really want it. But, I bet you know that Mark is being pathetic because Mark is practicing the nature and needs of Love in many stages of immersion for you that he does not have tingled heart, brain and nerves to do what God wants him and other people, and you too, to do. If Pathetic is for me, then Love is also Pathetic. Thank God now that you have thought that God is really Pathetic when He asks his children to practice Love to any single soul no matter what sex is. Is it wrong? Let me be put in Hell like you wish. Yeah, you always wish. In fact, you have wished it when you have texted me one simple painful line that I am really shocked and disappointed. However, when God has asked me to practice Love and to practice my brain to think logic and to be rational, I forgive you. This is also one of my sincere intelligences.

Thank God I have a good knowledge about Him. Am I proud? No, I am alienated.

You give thousand days, million hours, billion minutes, trillion seconds to me to wait for you, I still can stand still and wait. You think I joke about this? No...and you gotta know that in those waitings, My Mouth, My Brain, My Heart, My Soul and My Limbs speak "I love you." sincerely. Thank you for not listening, reading, speaking or writing anything to me...4 elements of a language does speak sincere intentions though they are mistakes of insincerities in them (but they are the sincere insincerities) Yes, they are the sincere insincerities.

Thank you for punishing me. I am punished and now I am kind, like you want me to be. I am always kind actually (bet you never know)

If you have a confused mind right now, I give you a hint, these are all metaphors. Metaphors that move us.

I will NOT stop loving you.

Let me cry alone. Who cares,eh? Mark is just a human, eh? Mark cares people like a doctor that Mark is not becoming to it, and will Mark be cared of? Who cares, eh?

I will NOT stop loving you.

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